Counseling and Support
South Shore Resource and Advocacy Center is a victim service, not-for-profit, community-based program that has been assisting survivors of domestic violence for over 40 years. SSRAC is a program of Southeast Family Services which believes that all people have the right to live free from violence and abuse. We provide free and confidential support, advocacy, prevention, and educational programs.
Housing Stabilization and Economic Advocacy and Support
Housing stabilization and economic advocacy, and support are provided. Assist with accessing housing assistance programs, locating affordable housing, budget advocacy and support. SSRAC also has limited housing stabilization funds to assist survivors with bill or rental payments. SSRAC seeks funding to provide financial assistance and intervention services for survivors who may face homelessness due to financial constraints or an inability to pay utilities, car payments, auto insurance, and/or registration with financial abuse acting as a component of ongoing violence.
Signs of an Unhealthy Relationship
- Is extremely jealous/possessive and checks in on you constantly
- Tries to control you by making all of the decisions and believes that only one person should be in control in the relationship
- Does not want you to have friends or to socialize without being present
- Tells you how to dress and what to wear
- Calls you names and puts you down
- Always accuses you of being unfaithful
- Frightens you by driving recklessly, throwing things, or getting in your face during arguments
- Threatens to harm you, your family, friends, pets and/or self
- Pressures you for sex or thinks of you as a sex object
- Blames you when they mistreat you. Says you provoked them, pressed their buttons, or made them do it
- Has a history of bad relationships and blames the former partner/s for everything
Safety When Preparing to Leave
Remember- leaving can be a dangerous time. Batterers can become upset and more dangerous when they believe that you are leaving the relationship.
- If you choose to leave your partner, make a safety plan
- Consult with an advocate from a local domestic violence program who can inform you of your rights and options
- Choose a safe place to go. Choose people who might help you when you leave
- Leave money, extra keys, copies of important documents, and clothes with someone you trust
- Purchase a calling card or get a 911 phone from a local domestic violence program
- Open a savings account in your name and have the statements sent to a relative or friend
If the batterer has access to weapons, has threatened homicide and/or suicide, has stalked you, and/or abuses drugs or alcohol, you may be in severe danger
Safety in the Moment
You cannot always avoid a violent incident, so create a safety plan.
- Determine who you would call for help in a violent situation. Make note of friends’, relatives’, neighbors’, police, and hotline numbers
- Memorize emergency phone numbers or keep them on small cards in a safe place
- If the abuser has a key to your house or apartment, change or add locks on your doors and windows as soon as possible
- Practice getting out of your home safely. Identify which doors, windows, elevators, or stairs would be best
- Avoid rooms with no exits, like a bathroom, and rooms with potential weapons, like the kitchen
- Decide and plan where you will go if you leave your home in an emergency situation
- Have a packed bag ready, and keep it in a secret but accessible place, so you can leave quickly (see checklist)
- Identify a neighbor, family member, or friend you can tell about the violence and ask the individual to call the police if they hear a disturbance coming from your home. Create a signal for them to call the police, such as if a certain light is on, a shade is pulled down, and/or a code word is heard
- Get medical attention if you are hurt in any way
- Speak with an advocate from the local domestic violence program, who can inform you of your rights and options
Safety with Children
- Teach children not to get in the middle of a fight- even if they think they are helping
- When children are old enough, practice calling 911 and teach them a safe place to go during a violent incident
- Inform your children’s daycare or school about who has permission to pick-up your children
- Talk to your children about who they can trust
- Discuss safety strategies with children, who have unsupervised visits with the abuser
Children’s S.E.E. Program
SSRAC also provides services to children through our Children Self-Esteem Enhancement (Children S.E.E.) for children and adolescents up to age 17.
The program serves children ages 4-17, who have been victims of or witnesses to violence within their home, school, or community.
The program offers a continuum of comprehensive, specialized services designed to meet the needs of traumatized children, who live in our 18-town catchment area: Carver, Duxbury, Halifax, Hanover, Hanson, Hingham, Hull, Kingston, Lakeville, Marshfield, Middleboro, Norwell, Pembroke, Plymouth, Plympton, Rochester, Scituate, Wareham.
Safety Plans
Safety plans are valuable tools if you are in/are planning on leaving an abusive relationship.
Here are some ideas and suggestions for safety, which you and your advocate can discuss. Please be aware some of these options may not work for you. Remember- you do not deserve to be afraid, hit, and/or threatened!
- Advocates can help you assess your current situation and create an individualized safety plan with you
- A safety plan is a list of ideas that you can use to help increase your safety
- A safety plan can be critical if you are considering taking steps to change your current situation
- Safety plans will change as new situations arise, so they must be revised frequently
- Use your instincts and judgement; think about what you will say to the abuser during a violent incident
Important Items
If you are leaving, these are some items that might be important to take. Try to put items in one location so that if you have to leave in a hurry, you can grab them quickly. Store them outside of your home, if possible.
- Identification and/or Driver’s license
- Passport for self and children
- Social security cards, for self and children
- Birth certificates for self and children
- Green card/immigration papers/work permits
- Welfare identification
- Marriage certificate, divorce papers
- Custody order and will
- Car title and registration
- Cash, credit cards, ATM card
- Cell phone (WARNING: cards and cell phone could potentially be traced by abuser)
- Checkbook, bank books, withdrawal slips
- Health insurance or medical card
- Medications and/or prescriptions
- Medical records for all family members
- Address book
- School records
- Lease, rental agreement, house deed
- Keys for the house and car
- Protective order, if you have one
- Jewelry
- Pets (if you can)
- Children’s small toys and/or blankets
- Pictures & personal items with special meaning or that cannot be replaced
- Change of clothes, for self and children
- Journal of abusive behavior, incl. photos
- Abuser’s personal info., social security, date of birth, and pay stubs
- Various insurance papers such as life, homeowner’s and renter’s insurance
Safety on the Job and in Public
- Change your route from and to work frequently
- Provide your employer with a current picture of the abuser
- Determine who can help you, while at work or in the public. Try to find a “safe” person/people at work, so they can look out for you. Provide a picture of the abuser if necessary
- Have someone escort you to your car, bus, or train. Create a plan for what you would do if something happened while in public
- Have a co-worker screen incoming telephone calls and document any harassing behavior
- Make sure your employer has up-to-date emergency information
- Attend a support group, if you feel that you need reassurances from others, who have been through similar situations